Top 5 Benefits of Mediation

 In divorce, FDRP, Mediation, Separation

Have you ever wondered why there is such an emphasis on why mediation is so beneficial?  Well from someone who has been both in a court room and around a mediation table let me tell you the top 5 benefits I have seen.

Number 1 – You can still have a relationship (of sorts) after a mediation.

First off, I know you are in the position you are because your relationship has ended.  But some people (i.e. those of you who have kids together) will still need to have a relationship albeit a co-parenting relationship going forward.  Mediation is the best way to lay the groundwork for this relationship.  I have never seen a couple walk out of a court room better friends than when they entered but I can say that I have seen couples walk out of mediation better for it.  Why?  Because you get to talk.  You can air issues that needed to be aired and you can do so in a respectful manner where you have control over the dialogue not a lawyer who is trying to win you a case (and this makes all the difference).  If a mediation is entered into with the right intentions you will be able to lay the groundwork for a new relationship.  It may not happen then and there but overtime you may be able to start to trust each other as co-parents all over again.

Number 2 – You have a say in the outcome.

This is a HUGE benefit and should not be underestimated.  I know some of you would find it so much easier to leave the decision making up to a Judge but let me remind you of some hard truths here:

  1. They do not know you or your family.
  2. They do not know what is important to you or your family.
  3. They do not understand what it means to your child if they can’t participate in an activity or go to an event.
  4. They do not understand the flexibility that you may need with your work.

I could go on and on here but I am sure you get the point.

At the end of the day, each of us are unique and our families are also unique.  What works for my family probably won’t work for yours and vice versa.  In a mediation you both are the decision makers.  Neither of you will get what you want (there will be compromise) but newsflash you may not get what you want from a Judge either.

Number 3 – It costs you so much less.

Not only in $$$$ but emotionally as well.

You may be put off by the initial lump sum investment you need to make with a mediator but in the long run – paying mediation fees is like going to a 5-star resort and paying caravan park prices.  It isn’t even a drop in the ocean if you end up at a trial – and that is only in $$$$ terms.

Emotionally, mediation can provide a forum to air and discuss issues and like I said before, you get to control the dialogue so you have control over the mud that gets thrown.

Number 4 – It saves time.

It is crazy to think that for some people getting to a trial can take years and I mean years (emphasis on the plural here).  Mediation is quick.  You can usually book and be in with a mediator in a very short turn around and if you don’t get everything sorted then and there then you can go back.  You are not restricted to when courts have availability and ultimately this means that you will both get a resolution and being able to move on sooner rather than later.

Number 5 – You learn how to communicate.

This is one of the hidden advantages to mediation.  The art of communication.  Have you ever noticed that when someone paraphrases and repeats back what they have just heard you can feel:

  1. Like a complete idiot for making a mountain out of a mole hill; or
  2. That the way they have said that is so much better than the way you explained it?

Either way, these are all the little nuggets that you will get from going to mediation.  This can be especially helpful for those of you who are parents.  When you leave the mediation room, hopefully you will leave thinking about what was said, what was discussed and you will remember the way the mediator phrased that concern. Or how, really the issue you thought was the deal breaker really isn’t in the scheme of things.

There you have it my top 5 benefits of mediation. There are many more but for me these are the most significant.

If you would like to find out if mediation is right for you, you can schedule a free appointment with me here or call 1300 433 302.    

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